London Part 1: Buses and Boats

On Monday I lost my Megabus virginity as MWF and I headed for London. I normally take the train because I like trains more and the idea of being stuck on a bus for hours fills me with dread. But with the bus being considerably cheaper we were hitting the road.

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MWF and I took our seats on the top deck and luckily I had a book to entertain me. I didn’t think it was that bad. The leg room wasn’t the best, but we were moving without issue.

However I did have to use the toilet somewhere near Reading and that was a mistake. If I should ever write a “5 Worst Toilets” post then the Megabus is guaranteed a spot. It was absolutely tiny, with my shoulders brushing both walls, and I had to tuck my head down. It was like peeing inside a small cupboard.

A very smelly cupboard.

That kept rocking.

I retreated upstairs and advised MWF to hold it if she could. I read for a bit, but I always get nauseous reading on the road, so had to stop. Another score for train travel.

I was hoping that I’d overhear some drama to write about or see something weird but the other passengers were a dull bunch and the most interesting thing was that a girl in front of us watched MMA fights the whole journey.

Arriving at Victoria we jumped a tube to King’s Cross and wandered to our hotel, where we dumped our stuff and chilled for a bit.

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Cool graffiti seen on our walk to Soho

MWF’s cousin works in Soho, so we walked in and hung out there for a while before we set off to find the Duchess Theatre, where we were to see Michael McIntyre, but more on that at a later date.

The first day over we hit the sack and had a day of sightseeing planned for the next day.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

A relaxing full English was interrupted thanks to a fire alarm which meant MWF and I had to loiter outside until we could return and eat. MWF had the sense to take her hot chocolate with her, but I was left with lukewarm tea.

After this we hit up the Museum of London, which was nice but I was glad it was free. It’s the kind of place that gives you information overload and the tattoo exhibit, which I was excited for is extremely short. It’s worth checking out if you’re at a loss, but I wouldn’t call it essential.

We passed St Paul’s but at £18 a head we decided to skip it. It felt ridiculously steep, because as one of London’s most iconic buildings it’s bound to be popular and you get the feeling if JC was to come back he’d be in there turning over tables of souvenirs and chasing out tour guides.

Breakfast was worked off as we walked on, crossing via the Millennium Bridge and then strolling alongside the Thames until we got to the London Eye. Here we hopped on to our river tour and were treated to some quality sights of London.

It helped that the guide was genuinely funny, making sarky comments and observations about the Houses of Parliament and the fact beer there is only 79p a pint as they don’t pay tax on it. Standing as an MP never sounded so appealing.

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View from the tour

The views were worth it even if it was rather chilly. We’d all but finished when MWF revealed that she had packed my hat. I gratefully pulled this on and it helped but later that day it would be stolen to protect MWF’s hair.

We disembarked and joined the queue for the Eye. MWF was nervous but I was excited and even the annoying school trip didn’t dampen my spirits.

Any thoughts? You know what to do. BETEO.

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