Today MWG and I went to see Jurassic World (review to follow), and while the new Premiere cinema is quite nice (reclining seats!) and the movie ticked a lot of boxes the whole experience was slightly ruined by other members of the audience.
Before the movie started a woman entered with three young children. And I mean very young, under 7s. What the hell is she thinking? I said to myself. Those kids are way too young for this flick. I know it’s a 12A and they have an adult with them, but exercise some common sense!
Luckily, aside from one incident where one of the nippers needed a break from the dino-carnage, not a peep was heard from them.
Of course, it might just have been drowned out by the obnoxious kids seated around me.
A group of boys aged between 10 and 13 were sitting, split in two, half in the back row over my right shoulder and three right in front of MWG and I.
I don’t want to go on a “kids today…” rant because these pint sized prats might just be exceptions, but my gods they were infuriating.
The ones in the back row were just loud. I get making the odd, hushed comment to a friend, but they were jabbering away and laughing, making stupid jokes and generally being annoying.
I shot them a glare, but was forced to actually tell them to shut up after a while. Luckily MWG went and had a word with the staff and they were dragged out for a warning, returning sheepishly and they were relatively quiet after this.
The ones in front of us, however, were insufferable brats from beginning to end. They jabbered a bit, but their major problem was the fact that they began tossing popcorn at each other, which they found hilarious.
It annoyed me immensely because (a) it was distracting (b) it was childish and their dimwitted enjoyment grated and (c) some poor cinema employee was going to have to pick up after them.
The popcorn throwing intensified near the end of the movie, and I managed to restrain myself from telling them to pack it in.
All I needed was to see was someone using their phone and I’d have won annoying audience bingo.
I thought back to my teenage cinema visits. My friends and I would make little gags to each other, but we weren’t loud enough to disturb anyone else.
And yes we occasionally left a mess, but always as a result of clumsiness, not acting like we were at a chimp’s tea party.
What the hell is wrong with people? Why would they think it was acceptable, didn’t they think about the poor schmo who has to clean up later?
Have they never been to the cinema before? Or if they have what the hell were their parents doing?
I loved going to the cinema as a kid, but my sisters and I knew the basic rules- stay seated, don’t make a mess and be quiet, because other people were trying to watch the film. All of us grasped this concept, so why do others not?
I think it boils down to parents not bothering. I went to a film once where a little boy ran around for much of the film, which was really annoying, and his parents did sod all to so sort it.
As a parent you’re responsible for teaching your kid how to behave in different situations, and the cinema is different from watching a film in your house because it’s not your house and there are other people there.
I swear when I have kids I’m bringing them up to follow the cinema code of conduct created by Mark Kermode and Simon Mayo, reprinted below.
Yes, they’ll know how to behave and if they don’t, well, they’ll be dragged out of screenings early.
Seriously, parents teach your kids how to behave. When the act up, tell them off, because it’s not my job to tell your kids to shut the hell up half way through a film.
And kids, don’t throw popcorn in the cinema, it’s not funny, it makes more work for someone and it makes everyone think you’re an idiot who shouldn’t be going to the cinema unless Mummy’s there with you. Basically, in the cinema, like everywhere else remember these words of wisodm- don’t be a d**k.
Any thoughts? You know what to do. BETEO.