News Grab Bag: Saddos, Ghosts and Beauty, both natural and faked

Donald, where’s your dignity?

Or money can’t buy you class.

Millionaire businessman and professional d**khead Donald Trump this week posted a video where he set out a deal for Barack Obama.

In the video Trump calls Obama the “least transparent President in the history of this country” and offers the President a deal. If Obama produces his college and passport applications Trump will give 5 million to charity. Why? Because he feels that this will be a “great service” to the US (isn’t being President already a pretty big service to the country?) and stop the “questions and anger of many Americans”, who will now “know something about their President”.

Here’s the video below, its extremely watchable to see the weird-haired loon rant and rave, before delivering his deal in a manner reminiscent of Dr Evil:

I can’t help but feeling that for most Americans the need to see their leader’s passport applications is that much of a big deal. There’s a tiny minority who probably cling to the daft “birther” conspiracy theories and refuse to accept that Obama is really a Yank and as American as apple pie (although apples were actually imported to the States by European settlers). Trump was a massive part of this conspiracy and lent his voice to the calls for Obama to release his long form birth certificate.

Obama released it and Trump states he’s “honoured” to have got the Prez to release the certificate before then adding “or whatever it may be”. Dude, seriously, let it go!

Trump comes across terribly, to the extent you have to wonder where his people are. Or is there a whole emperor’s new clothes thing going on at Trump towers? Are they all too afraid of their boss to just say “Mr Trump, if you release this video you’re going to look ridiculous. More ridiculous.”

Trump obviously thinks that he has Obama over a barrel, that if he says no he’ll look like someone who doesn’t give a crap about the people the charity would help, but regardless of how Obama responds its Trump who’s gonna come off looking bad. This is a multimillionaire who’s only going to give money to charity as the result of blackmailing someone.

Just give the money to charity, stop being a jerk and hire some decent PR, man.

Natural Beauty and Fake Aging

Some beauty company did a poll of British women to discover the most naturally beautiful celebrities. Holly Willoughby, Jessica Ennis, Keira Knightley and Kate Winslet all made the top 10 and the winner was future Queen Kate Middleton.

I’d go along with that as she’s an extremely pretty girl and does have a rather nice, understated look.

That being said, I’m not massively into the whole “war on fakery”, if fake nails, plastic surgery and lots of make up is what makes a girl feel more confident and beautiful, then go for it. The world don’t move to the beat of just one drum and all that, and also, sometimes the slightly trashy look works for me.

However, I recently saw pictures of Amy Childs, who I have a bit of a soft spot for. The thing is, she looks a little rough and quite old in the face, so I was a little surprised when I found out she’s only 22. Hmm. Maybe there is something to that anti-makeup stuff.

The world’s most expensive hymen?

Or money can’t buy you class part 2.

A Brazilian woman has auctioned her virginity online and it fetched the unbelievable price of £485,000.

That’s enough for a pretty nice house ’round these parts, and is frankly ludicrous.

The young lady in question, Catarina Migliorini, apparently did it through a website called Virgins Wanted.

I just can’t believe that someone would pay that much money to sleep with anyone, let alone a virgin, it’d be like a football club buying a new player who’s never been on the field before, for that kind of money you’d want an expert, surely.

Here’s the thing, call me a romantic sap, but I do think that someone’s first time is a big deal. Its a big part of life, and the one you’re going to remember regardless of however many follow. It shouldn’t just be thrown away, even for a massive wad of cash. Some things are worth more than mere money.

That whole “one you remember” thing is probably why Mr Lonely-Moneybags coughed up the cash, he wants to be her sexual Neil Armstrong or something. But I’d rather be forgotten than remembered as some sad loser who paid all that cash just to get laid.

Ghost or fake?

Fake. Quite clearly this is fake, can’t believe this was posted on a news site when its clearly just someone in the back pulling a face.

I now have 2 things in common with Superman

This week DC announced that Superman’s alter-ego, Clark Kent (did I really need to put that in? Surely everyone knows that) has quit his job at the Daily Planet, and may well be about to become a blogger, which means I am now slightly more like the Man of Steel than I was before (I wear glasses too, although unlike CK I actually really need them, and people still know who I am if I take them off). I kind of get where the idea has come from, but its still a big change, and I’m a bit of a purist when it comes to Superman.

Scumbags

London 2012, despite the fears of the pre-games naysayers, turned out to be a big success. Britain united behind a hugely successful team, the Paralympics have hopefully improved attitudes towards the disabled and it seems to have helped the economy. I for one, was riding a bit of a buzz after the games, it had been an inspiring, entertaining spectacle and a positive thing.

If I met an Olympic medal winner, I’d congratulate them, shake them by the hand and offer to buy them a drink (and possibly make an ill advised pass at them if it was Jessica Ennis, Gabrielle Douglas, Nicola Adams or Ellie Simmonds). I think most of us would offer them a “well done” and be on our way, but this week some douchebag stole the Bronze medals belonging to rower Alex Partridge and hockey player Hannah Macleod.

That’s not cool, man. I mean, why the hell would you do that? I’d imagine you can’t flog them without someone twigging that you aren’t the rightful owner and why would you want to keep a medal that you didn’t earn? If you put it on your shelf would you experience any emotion while looking at it other than shame and guilt? I hope the medals are returned to their rightful owners as soon as possible.

Any thoughts? You know what to do. BETEO

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